Intelligent People Recommend Drinking 11 Glasses Of Booze Per Day To Help Stave Off Reality
A recent study conducted by intelligent people recommends that citizens consume at least 11 glasses (or bottles) of booze per day to help stave off reality.
If you work in a particularly stressful job, then it is recommended that you quadruple this number.
Escaping from the reality of high taxes, s*it weather, bad bosses and people who have B.O. can be incredibly hard.
Anyone who works night shits is particularly vulnerable from the harsh effects of reality.
Especially when you are trying to sleep during the day, and your neighbour (who refuses to work) stays at home all day smoking ‘herbs’ and play their s*ite music really loud.
Talking about the study, our Chief Morale Officer said:
“It’s that time of year again when the weather and peoples generally s*it attitudes make you wonder why you bother.
“However, all is not lost.
“Studies which have been carried out by intelligent people seem to indicate that the more booze you consume, then the less you tend to be able to relate to reality.
“Of course, we must point out that drinking is bad for you and, in truth, you would probably be better off meditating or attending swinging parties.”
Have you experienced a morale failure?
If ‘yes’, then you are encouraged to send us a three-minute video detailing what happened and how the morale failure has affected your well-being.
These videos will then be shared with your fellow citizens (via our facebook page) who will then offer you advice on how to best overcome the morale failure.
Videos should be sent to the Ministry via our Facebook page.