Always Answer Your Phone By Saying ‘My Battery Is Almost Dead’ To Avoid Unwanted Conversations

The Ministry of Morale has detected a severe and sharp increase in the number of calls being made to our morale hotline by citizens who have experienced morale failures after being forced to speak to someone on the phone who they do not like. 

This situation can occur when, for example, your boss calls you on a withheld number or your supervisor ends up calling you using a colleagues phone which they have commandeered JUST to try and speak to you. 

Having to then speak to someone who you have been trying to avoid can cause an instantaneous and prolonged morale failure. 

For this reason, the Ministry of Morale is advising citizens to always answer their phones by stating: 

‘Hi, my battery is almost dead, but go ahead anyway although the line might cut off’. 

This will mean that if anyone who you are trying to avoid does get through to you, then you will be able to quickly terminate the call without having to worry about finding excuses to end the conversation. 

Talking about the situation, our Chief Morale Officer said:

“Having to deal with the trials tribulations of life can be stressful enough, without also having to speak to people you are trying to avoid such as your supervisor or manager. 

“This is why we are advising ALL citizens to start answering their phone with the greeting, as outlined above. 

“By following this advice, you willl be able to avoid having to do annoying and morale-depleting things such as having to work overtime or having to stay on at work because your supervisor asks if you want to “volunteer” to stay behind. 

“It also means that you won’t have to endure dull conversations with people who like nothing more than to tell you about how sh*te their day has been without even asking you about yours.” 

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