Amazon Fire Sticks Blamed For Amazon Fires

Citizens have been calling for Amazon Firesticks to be banned following the devasting fires which have led to less oxygen being produced owing to the destruction of the rainforest.

Despite the greedy little bas_ards who have been starting the fires giving zero f__ks about the damage which they have been causing to the planet’s lungs, there has been widespread disgust at what has been happening.

Owing to the insatiable greed of some people, fires have been deliberately started to get rid of ancients trees so that farmers can become millionaires by turning the rainforest into farmland.

Our Chief Morale Officer said:

“Yet again, we learn that the greed of some people no knows bounds or limits.

“Who would have thought that the greed of some citizens and their selfishness could have led to millions of acres of lush rainforest being destroyed so that they can make a few quid from soya beans?

“The President of Brazil is an egotistical disgrace who seems to be more concerned with making money than preserving humanity.

“I am sure that hell will have a special place reserved for the sort of individuals who think that money in their bank accounts is more important than the preservation of humanity.

“Some people have been calling for the sale of Amazon Firesticks to cease owing to the fires.

“However, we would like to point out that these ‘firesticks’ are:

A) Not Fire Sticks
B) Cannot be found in the lush rainforest.

“We can only hope that there will still be enough oxygen to go around, as we have worked out that there are approximately 6.2 billion sets of lungs which need a constant supply of oxygen to survive.

“And considering that the rainforest not only produces oxygen but also helps to get rid of CO2, then there is a fair chance that we could all be f__ked.

“And this is thanks to the greedy little s__ts who are burning down the rainforest, backed by their belligerent President who seems to be obsessed with collecting as much money as possible.

“It is hardly surprising that morale is at an all-time low when you consider just how many self-serving, greedy f__kwits there are in the world”.

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