‘WE GOT IT WRONG’ | Fire Service Admits They Made A Mistake Buying Fire Engines With The Word ‘MAN’ On Them

What with all the kerfuffle recently over tissue manufacturers calling one of their products ‘mansize’ and, in doing so, offending people who really should perhaps have more important things to worry about, a fire service based somewhere in the UK has (not) confirmed that they are going to remove the word ‘MAN’ from the front of their fire engines.

In the context of fire engines, the word  ‘MAN’ (found on the front of the vehicles) actually refers to the company (Maschinenfabrik Augsburg-Nürnberg) that build and supply the fire engines as opposed to referring to any of the 3,000 sexes which are currently in existence.

But why let that get in the way of offending people who love nothing more other than to be offended? By anything and everything…

In a recent statement that is still being reviewed by our Man and Woman staff, our (for the purpose of this article) gender neutral Chief Morale Officer Said:

“We have been told, by an undisclosed source, that a fire service is going to remove the word ‘MAN’ from the front of their vehicles and replace the word with ‘GENDER NEUTRAL’

“This is despite the fact that everyone knows that ‘MAN’ simply refers to the manufacturers of the massive red trucks.

“However, our source has said that the 0.000001% of people who get offended by, literally, everything and anything, have been tweeting them telling them that their 4-year-olds have been asking why the Fire Engines have the word ‘MAN’ on them and does it mean that only ‘Men’ can drive them.

“Clearly, these conversations never actually took place, but large organisations have already been bent over the politically correct barrel and have been rogered (dry) up the anus by the long and abrasive politically correct stick.

Screenshot 2018-10-22 at 15.32.12

Artist’s impression of the new ‘Gender Neutral’ Fire Engines

“And because everyone is worried about offending anyone, then organisations are starting to act now in order to appease people who don’t even really exist because we have yet to hear from anyone who, for example, actually cares as to whether or not tissues are called ‘man size”.

To stay up-to-date with further morale updates, then follow our page.  Please be aware, that our website and articles are 100% satirical.

We have to add this note, as people will think that Fire Authorities are actually going to start taking the word ‘MAN’ off the front of fire engines and replacing it with ‘Gender Neutral’.

Welcome to the 21st century….. Stay safe out there….

The Ministry of Morale is committed to try and increase the morale of all citizens both inside and outside of the public sector, from all over the world. 

If you have experienced a sudden and unexpected drop in morale, for whatever reason, and you would like to make us aware of what has happened, then you are encouraged to make a short video of the ‘morale failure’ and send it into us via our facebook page (see below). 

The video might then be shared with the general public in order to bring awareness to the issue that has led to the morale failure. 

Remember to follow our page (below) for more regular morale updates and recommendations which will be ignored by those in Government.

 

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