Police Called To An Address As Tenant Refuses To Leave
The Ministry of Morale has been made aware of an on-going incident involving a tenant who is refusing to leave an address in central London, despite repeatedly being asked to do so.
According to our morale agents who are at the address, the tenant concerned has been at the address for several years but is now refusing to leave despite her landlord asking her to.
We don’t know much about the lodger, but we have been told that she has previously shafted the police up the backside and has chipped away at the emergency services for many years.
We have also been told that she has ‘form’ for not listening to the police, so we are expecting a prolonged stand-off.
Our morale agents also inform us that the tenant has previously indicated her disdain for military veterans – all factors which have allegedly caused her landlord to insist that she leaves the property.
Police negotiators had been sent to the address, but due to cutbacks, there aren’t any available.
Officers requested further units on the scene after she was seen to be in the company of people in suits who appear to be armed with 9mm pistols.
However, no other units are available, because they are either filling out paperwork in the name of political correctness, are trying to simultaneously investigate 25 crimes or are having their first day off for months, having had their rest days cancelled every day for the last four weeks.
Talking about the situation, our Chief Morale Officer said:
“Clearly, there has been an epic failure in morale here – both concerning the tenant and her Landlord; Someone known only as ‘the taxpayer’.
“We have been informed that the tenant could have been responsible for various morale failures over the years, but this has not been confirmed.
“Our morale agents are currently on-scene and are trying to reason with the tenant, but we have been told that she is not particularly good at listening to the police, the emergency services, the NHS, the prison service and the armed forces.
“As soon as we know anymore, then we will, of course, let citizens know”.