New Safety Advert For Cyclists Is Causing INSTANT Morale Failures
The Ministry of Morale has been made aware of an advert that has been placed on the back of a bus that is highly offensive to citizens who have decided to use two wheels (on a pedal bike) in order to get around town.
At this stage, it is not known just where in the world this advert has been produced, but our international team of morale agents are on the case and are investigating the poster.
We have been informed that the advert has caused multiple morale failures in cyclists owing to the offensive words which have been used on the poster.
And, despite the safety message of the poster, we are advising cyclists to look away from the poster whenever they see it (assuming that you are cycling in the country where the adverts are being displayed).
Just in case you haven’t got your glasses on and you can’t read the poster, it says:
‘If you don’t see him (no mention of ‘her’), neither will his family.
‘So watch out for dumb f**ks on bikes’.
Whilst, owing to the way the poster is worded, this ‘message’ will no-doubt be read by many citizens, we are preparing to be inundated by calls from cyclists via our morale hotline who, having seen this outrageously worded poster, will inevitably experience a morale failure.
Talking about the situation, our Chief Morale Officer said:
“Be under no illusion, that when we find the country and province where these naughty posters are being displayed on the back of buses, then we WILL act accordingly.
“This will mean that, as soon as one of these posters is spotted by one of our morale agents, then they will deploy their ‘Tip Ex’ and the offending word, in this case, the word ‘f__k’, will be covered over.
“Here at the Ministry of Morale, we want to encourage more citizens to use their bikes, as the climate is well-and-truly f__ked owing to the greedy oil companies who, for years now, have been making billions of pounds of off our citizens, despite the technology being available that means combustion engines in cars are no longer needed.
“We are urging cyclists to be prepared for an instant failure in their morale, should they see one of these adverts on the back of a bus during their travels.
“In the event of the advert being spotted by citizens, then you are encouraged to pull over and find a ‘safe place’ until such time as your morale is fully restored.
“Should you need further moral support, then you are invited to join our official ‘morale group’ on Facebooks by clicking HERE”.