Category Archives: Animal Morale

Dog Owners Who Refuse To Clean Up Their Dog’s S*it Will Have Their Faces Rubbed In It

Recently, our morale hotline has been inundated with calls from angry citizens who have endured morale failures after stepping in dog s*it that has been left on the streets and in parks by lazy dog owners.  Because so many people have been off of work and have been walking their dogs over the last two weeks, the amount of dog

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Citizens Urged Not To Give Skittles To Their Dogs After Rainbow Emerges From Dogs Bum

“Taste the rainbow” has long been the slogan associated with the popular sweets known as ‘Skittles’.  However, the MoM is urging citizens to make sure that they refrain from giving their pets these sweets after a rainbow was spotted emanating from a dogs butt.  The dog had found a packet of the sweets which had been purchased by its owner.

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Cat Owner Too Scared To Return Home After Cats Eats Years Supply Of Protein Powder

A cat-owning-citizen has endured an enormous morale failure after returning home only to find that their cat had grown to such an extent, that it filled the whole house.  Ms Feline had left her cat at home when she went shopping for some general day-to-day amenities and morale.  However, Ms Feline forgot to shut the door to her cupboard, which

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Heroic Dog Swims 22 Nautical Miles Out To Sea To Retrieve Owners Ball

A heroic hound has been commended by ball enthusiasts for swimming 22 miles out into the North Sea to retrieve his owner’s favourite tennis ball.  The dog, named ‘Neptune’, was taking its owner for a walk along the beach earlier this year.  The dog had instructed its owner to repeatedly throw the ball into the heavy seas so that ‘Neptune’

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Police Deploy Undercover ‘Land Sharks’ In Order To Deter Thieves

Images have emerged on social media of what is believed to be the first undercover police dog (aka ‘Land Shark’) taken as the dog spied on some wrong’uns using binoculars, whilst hiding under a car. These highly-trained dogs are able to spend long periods of time on surveillance jobs as they only need a small bowl of water and some

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Citizens Asked NOT To Put Their Dogs In Bins After They Have Pooped

During a routine morale patrol, our morale enforcement officers noticed that a citizen had placed their dog directly into a bin after her dog had pooped on a communal bit of grass. As the citizen who had carried out this worrying act was still in the vicinity, our morale enforcement officers asked her to account for her actions. It transpired

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New Replacement For POLICE DOGS & Their Handlers Finally Announced

As citizens will know, there are some strange politicians out there who think that, by cutting the number of police officers, then crime won’t increase. Here at the MoM, we know that most of you cannot understand why anyone with any common sense would think that cutting the numbers of police officers was a good idea, unless, of course, a

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WATCH: Internet Almost Crashes As Video Emerges Of Chimpanzee Using Instagram

At around 10 am this morning (25th April) our Morale Monitoring Team detected that the internet almost melted as billions of people all tried watching video footage of a chimpanzee using Instagram. The uplift in morale that occurred after people watched the video was unprecedented. In the footage (below) a chimpanzee can be seen not only watching videos on Instagram,

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Police Dogs To Be Sent Out On Single Patrol

The Ministry of Morale is today announcing that police dogs will now have to go out on patrol without their handlers. This news comes in response to the additional cost savings which police forces around the country are expected to implement, which will then be overturned again as they (the cost savings) don’t work. Dogs or, ‘Land Sharks’ as they

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