Category Archives: Satire

Male Tries To Outsmart A ‘Medical Kiosk’, But FAILS

An unhappy citizen contacted us recently after they had a bizarre encounter with a ‘medical kiosk’. The message sent into our Morale Operations Centre read: ‘Asda installed a medical kiosk, for £10 and a urine sample, it would diagnose any condition. ‘When my friend went with a sore elbow, the computer printout read: “You have tennis elbow. Soak it in

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New ‘GINBULANCES’ Being Rolled Out Across The Country

The Ministry of Morale is pleased to confirm that from an as-yet-unspecified date, a new emergency ‘Ginbulance’ service will be introduced. The ‘Ginbulance’ will be on-hand to make its way to anyone who requires a Gin, for whatever reason. Citizens who need Gin will be able to call a dedicated number that will put them straight through to the Gin

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All New Toilets To Be Fitted With USB Chargers

The Ministry of Morale is excited to announce that, as from an as yet undetermined date, all toilets will be fitted with USB charging points. This measure is being introduced because the Ministry of Morale has noticed that millions of citizens each year experience morale failures after their phones run out of charge after sitting on the toilet for several

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15-Year-Old Lad Sues Parents For Setting Up CCTV In His Room To Stop Him W__king

A young lad who suffered from a significant morale failure is intending to sue his mum and dad after they installed mini CCTV cameras in his bedroom to stop him from ‘pleasuring himself.’ The disgruntled 15-year-old boy from Alaska told local morale agents that his parents set up the security cameras in his bedroom after his mother caught him ‘in

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Citizen Collects Lottery Winnings Wearing A ‘Scream’ Mask So His Friends & Family Don’t Ask Him For Money

A citizen based in the U.S. has been photographed picking up his lottery winnings while wearing a scream mask. Our Morale Agents, based in the U.S., told us that this was because the lucky winner did not want his family or friends to start asking him for money. The bizarre photoshoot, however, did not hide the surname and initial of

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Police Officer Endures Morale Failure After Being Forced To Deflate A ‘Donut Floaty’

Our American Morale Embassay has made us aware of an incident that occurred, which has resulted in a police officer suffering from a morale failure after being forced to deflate a ‘donut floaty’. In a post shared on the Waukesha County Sheriff’s Department Facebook page, a spokesperson said: ‘Deputy McDonald consoles Deputy Kristalidis after he had to deflate a donut

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What To Know What You Will Look Like If You Smoke Meth? Use The Face App ‘Age’ Feature

The Ministry of Morale has noticed how popular the ‘face app’ (ageing feature) has become as millions of citizens indulge themselves in a bit of time travelling into the future. The freaky pictures have been filing the social media timelines of the bewildered family and friends of the individuals who have been using the feature. However, what many citizens have

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WATCH: Drones Armed With Fireworks Being Used To Break Up Morale Gatherings (Street Parties)

Undercover Morale Agents, based in our Brazil office, have made us aware of a new tactic being employed by some citizens to break up gatherings of people who are engaging in various urban morale activities. In the video below, a Brazilian citizen decided that he had enough of an impromptu street party that had kicked off near to his home

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‘We’ll Make It Rain For 365 Days To Reduce Crime’ Says Chief Morale Officer

The Ministry of Morale is announcing plans to interfere with the climate to make it rain for the next 365 days. it is hoped that, by doing this, then crimes rates around the country will start to decrease as wrong-uns tend not to go out when it’s wet. Since Mrs May cut police numbers, we have seen an increase in

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