Category Archives: Citizen Morale

Protestors Call On Food Companies To Stop Killing Fish For Their Fingers

The Ministry of Morale has had some top intelligence via our undercover morale agents regarding some protestors who are planning to descend on London, to call for a halt to killing fish for their fingers. Fish fingers are a favourite meal for both adults and children, but protestors are concerned about the amount of fish which are being harvested just

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Male Wanted By The Police Turns Himself In And Tries To Claim £10,000 Reward

The Ministry of Morale has been made aware of a morale failure that occurred after a wanted man turned himself in, hoping that he would get the £10,000 reward that was being offered for his capture. Unfortunately, the male did not realise that he could not claim the reward and thus experienced an immediate morale failure as he had been

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109-Year-Old Woman Confirms That Secret To Long Life Is Avoiding Other People

The Ministry of Morale has recently published the results of a survey that we conducted on citizens aged over 100-years-old, where we asked them what the ‘secret’ to a long life was. 98% of those who responded told us unequivocally that the key to their longevity was their ability to avoid other people – specifically those who are deemed as

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Theresa May To Appear In This Years Series Of Love Island

While monitoring our morale detection equipment, Morale HQ detected an outbreak of morale in the production offices of Love Island. Upon further investigation, it transpired that Theresa May had agreed to go on this year’s series of the popular show as a contestant. The announcement was welcomed with rapturous applause as Mrs May could do with a break away from

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Police Investigate As Stolen Trolleys Are Being Used As BBQ’s

The Ministry of Morale has been made aware of a new trend that seems to be sweeping the country whereby citizens are stealing supermarket shopping trolleys to have impromptu BBQ’s in public parks. The craze has become so popular, that shoppers are apparently turning up at supermarkets only to find that they have to try and cram a week’s worth

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New ‘Masturbation Tax’ To Be Introduced To Raise Much-Needed Funds

Running a country is expensive. Especially when the private sector knows exactly how to mug you off and you pay your politicians £100,000 per year for a few days of work. So that’s why we have decided to introduce a ‘masturbation tax’ that will help to ‘raise’ some much-needed funds. Seeing as how citizens get taxed to the hilts on

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WATCH: Police & Medics Spring Into Action After Football Supporter GBH’d By A Ball

The Ministry of Morale has been made aware of an incident that occurred recently whereby a rogue ball at a football match GBH’d a spectator owing to the manner in which the spectator was eating what appeared to be a hot dog. In the video (below) the victim can be seen eating his hotdog in an extremely sensual and highly

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