Category Archives: Citizen Morale

‘Jeremy’s Retirement Drinks’ Event Set Up On Facebook With 13k Citizens ‘Interested’

A retirement drinks event has been set up on Facebook to mark the imminent retirement of the current Leader of the Labour Party, Jeremy Corbyn.  The ‘event’ is running from today up until the 25th December, meaning that the knees-up will be spanning 12 days; making it one of the most extended retirement drinks events ever recorded.  So far, 5,100

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Santa Goes AWOL After A Heavy Drinking Session In Poland

The Ministry of Morale (Morale Coordination Centre) has been notified about an incident involving Santa while he was transiting through Poland.  At around 23:15 hours yesterday evening, Santa was seen to enter a strip club in a well known night spot as he stopped for a quick break in Poland.  However, he did not emerge from the festive venue until

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Christmas Postponed After Santa Endures 72-Hour Wait In A&E

Unfortunately, Christmas has now been postponed in order to give Santa enough time to recuperate from a 72-hour wait in A&E.  The Festive character was taken to hospital via a blue-light Taxi-ambulance after he became stuck in someone’s chimney during a trial run, ready for the 24th December.  However, the chimney that he picked was much smaller than his large

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Have You Seen Them? Missing Person Reports Filed For Diane Abbott & Jacob Rees-Mogg

The Ministry of Morale has filed two missing person reports for Diane Abbott and Jacob Rees-Mogg.  The duo has not been seen since the general election (to be held on the 12th December) was announced.  Rees-Mogg was last seen three weeks ago being chased down by an angry pack of citizens who were heard to shout various expletives at him. 

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Man Turns Into A Doughnut After Eating The Sweet Treat Non-Stop For Ten Years

The Ministry of Morale has been informed of a morale failure involving a citizen who ate only doughnuts for around ten years.  The male in question woke up to find that overnight, his body had taken on the form of a doughnut.  As soon as we heard about the incident, we sent our morale agents to the location to support

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Christmas Decorations Which Ruined Christmas

As citizens start to prepare to adorn their houses with fairy lights and other festive decorations, the Ministry of Morale is reminding citizens to make sure that their decorations comply with the relevant law. Last year, the Ministry of Morale was inundated with complaints from citizens who had experienced morale failures after turning up to their relatives’ house only to

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New Baby Shield Means Less Mess, More Love For Parents & Babysitters

The Ministry of Morale has introduced a new ground-breaking product for parent citizens which will mean that you won’t be at risk of being covered in bodily fluids when you change or play with your baby citizen.  For too long now, parents have had to contend with being urinated and pooped on when undertaking every-day tasks such as changing nappies

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Crowdfunding Page Set Up For Bungle After He Hits Tough Times

A crowdfunding page has been set up to help a once-popular children’s TV character to sort himself out.  Bungle, or ‘Big B’ as he is known to his friends and former colleagues, became popular in the ’90s after appearing on well-known kids show.  At one point, he almost became a billionaire after charging parents £100 to show up at kids

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